どくがんりゅう の 軍記物語

A Man Kissing Yoshimitsu

Hideo was going. Tsubasa felt cold and impersonal in his looming as he directed the chair from behind. They were going back to his room. If he were at a park the carnie would guess his weight 30 lbs over. He wasn’t really in a hover chair. He was a floating seed, curled, being ushered down a metallic hall by a man-made angel.

Tsubasa wouldn’t appreciate the image. He had been making out with Hideo, after crying, after all that. The Thing was being loaded onto a ship, Grayson was a demon or who knew what with no chance of anything, and he had been snogging a man. Everything was perfect. Perfect in every way. Maybe the metal walls and sliding doors, solitary confinement, cafeteria and soldiers…it all was perfectly matched with a high security funny farm. They’d been talking about rape and hell, reincarnation and a dead demon, or something, like it was all the most normal shit in the world. Hideo had laughed. And I want to be kissing a man. More then that. To the sound of the door sliding open, Tsubasa laying him on his bed, he felt the sicky, bile ball rise in his throat. The seraph had a waste bin in front of him the moment he shifted to try to get off the bed. There wasn’t much there, the chirashizushi bits and tea. Tsubasa pet between his shoulders. “Fast-”He managed between dry heaves, the last of it gone while his muscles had a royal freak out. “It could be worse.” What the hell was that supposed to mean? Yeah, he could be gutted again and laying in his own intestine again. He wasn’t going to complain about some dry heaves, other then it Fucking Hurt. When things Hurt, you expressed that fact if you weren’t trying to prove your balls of steel to someone. “There are only two stories to tell in life, Yoshi. Ones where you spend the whole time trying to forget what you’ve already read, and ones where you can’t remember anything beyond a certain point, but you can see the glued pages or missing and torn edges where they used to be …meaning you spend the rest of the book trying to find out what was in them. " “What….” The heaves weren’t stopping. “Delilah, replicator, muscle relaxant quick release.” Tsubasa had retrieved the air-injector from the replicator tray before Yoshi’s eyes, even with their augments, could record the motion. The nozzle was pressed, cold, to his belly. Like a gun to the already inflamed wound that had festered while Dr. Chen had hauled him along. He could have died then. Should have. He wouldn’t have to be dealing with all this shit if he had. He would have gone out after a gun fight, after seeing Hideo again and knowing that Rana and Damocles and San were being carted off to whatever new life was beyond the tunnels of Undercity. He had just been with Kitten. He’d been really confused, but kinda happy. “Yoshi.” “Un” “Be glad you remember his face. Its all greetings and partings, and you still have more to do. " “The fuck? " He didn’t need another pep talk. And there was no way he was going to end up kissing Tsubasa. Not like Tsubasa wasn’t one of the kingpin freako’s in the joint. “It isn’t that simple.” “You can’t figure it out anyway. " Yoshi hit him, as hard as he could, across his face. There was a smear of blood from some opened knuckles, but Tsubasa wasn’t surprised or phased. He probably could have dodged it. “Yoshi, accept your feelings, that is all you can do with them. Sometimes there isn’t a solution. " “That’s fucking different then being too dumb.” “Sorry.” Just because it was true, didn’t mean it needed said. He hadn’t ever fucked with Tsubasa. "So is that what you’re going to do? Can you just accept your shit and move on? What the hell is your deal, anyway? I didn’t say ‘hey, Tsubasa, get up in my shit and be my fucking councilor.’ " “My shit has to do with what I was made into, what is inside me. Machine and man, and whatever other curses my maker deigned to place on my model. " “You were Juliet-ing for your Romeo when you though Hideo was dead, but I don’t see you getting the fuck over all that. You just stand there and stoner instead of getting on his jolly-roger.” “I’m not gay, Yoshi.” Tsubasa stood, and took the waste bin to the sink to rinse while the yakuza flopped over on the bed again. "I haven’t fully accepted what has happened, no. But at least I know I have to. You didn’t know and are just circling around, like a lost pigeon in a mall, with your grief. " “Besides, "Tsubasa set the bin on the floor again, turning to go, "the Yuuki Hideo I knew and wanted to fuck is as much a fairytale as your cleaner is now. "

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